Holidays in the Sun

Chris wanted to book some holiday:
Chris: “Ed, I wanted to book a holiday at the weekend. Is it okay…”
Junior: “You want to have the weekend as holiday? That’s fine, have both days off.”
Chris: “No, I want to book a holiday at the weekend for later in the year.”
Junior: “You What?”
Chris: “I want to book a Summer holiday at the weekend.”
Junior: “It’s still Winter. You can’t have a Summer holiday at the weekend.”
Chris: “I want a holiday in the Summer, and I want to book it at the weekend.”
Me: “You want to book some holiday for next financial year?...That should be fine, no one else has booked anything off so far for next year. When are you thinking of going?”
Chris: “July time probably. We went about that time last year.”
Me: “Where are you going?”
Chris: “We’re probably thinking of going to Tenerife.”
Me: “Really?...That shit-hole? Any of the other Canary Islands are better than Tenerife.”
Junior: “How dare you!...Tenerife is one of the best holiday places I’ve ever been to.”
Me: “How many places have you ever been to?”
Chris: “Actually, I remember you telling Dave that you weren’t very impressed by it.”
Me: “It’s overdeveloped, overcrowded, with black sand.”
Junior: “It’s got lovely golden beaches…hasn’t it?”
Me: “No, it’s all volcanic black sand.”
Junior: “Don’t listen to him. It’s bar, bar, nightclub, bar…all along the main street. If you go further out there’s some more dodgy places you can find if you know where you’re going.”
Me: “He’ll do you a map.”

Junior then goes on about him and his mates getting up to no good in seedy nightclubs. As usual his mate Neil gets into a fight or two.