Staff Potential

Rick’s section are discussing their AMP (Achieving their potential), which partly decides how much pay increase they get each year. Jason is new to Rick’s section, and has never had an AMP review.
Dave: “Nobody upset Rick for the next two days lads.”
Rick: “I’m not discussing AMPs in the office, it’s supposed to be private.”
Jason: “I’ve never discussed my potential with you anyway.”
Dave: “You haven’t discussed it with him because you haven’t got any.”

Later on Jason is getting a round of drinks from the coffee machine. It’s late afternoon, so a few of the staff have left (he’s no fool). He comes round asking if we all want drinks. Dave asks for a water, then adds “…and have one for yourself.”

For our sections AMP, Karen took down the last 5 of our staff who joined for a meeting, because they have never seen the AMP before. She gathered them together and took them down to the canteen to explain it all. This left the remaining few staff looking puzzled as to why they had not been invited down with them. As she left the office she was heard to say “It’s nothing to worry about.” Then one of the Steve’s responded with “It’s too late now, I’ve shit myself.”